Sex Resurrection

It felt oddly natural

that the wolf

would awaken

the phoenix from her slumber

with his haunted howl.

Earth to fire

back to earth,

we stumble through

our parts,

our characters,

our elements

always changing with the weather.

Sex resurrection,

obscene holy,

profane miracles,

my magic trick

was to see inside the mirror’s reflection

and understand its ethereal alchemy

though the experience was dumbed down

with useless language
that never explained exactly
what I'd seen,

and the pathetic cycle
of forcing myself 

to either

speed up or

slow down

my brain’s circuits

to fit the crowd,

cause I was expected

to still pay rent right?

Still having to chat with neighbors,

talk about work and war,

go to parties and be scintillating,

still having to rage on government spending,
argue that Black Lives DO Matter,

fight misogynistic assholes about

payoffs to set

rapists free

so they can go back to making America

a proud sporting nation.

What?

What did you want me to say?

I ate my organic grapefruit

for breakfast,

worked towards the picket fence dream

that wasn’t mine,

kissed the wife,

exercised for 30 min,

fed the kids,

went to bed,

repeat,

when what I really did

was wake up

an hour after I was supposed

to be somewhere

with a headache I tried to ignore,

washed my

anti-psychotic meds

down with the

leftover glass of wine

from the night before,

ate a peppermint patty

as I threw on

the clothes that were

on the floor

closest to my bed,

stumbled out the door,

lied through the days with

“Im fine.”

“It’s fabulous,”

all the while thinking:

Act Normal,

God please

let my fake normal

again today

because really

Im a walking hurricane

and I just miss my family

and want to go to a home

that Im forgetting.

Even so,

I kept pulling

the Tower

over and over:

the tarot will

yell at you

until you hear her.

So I saw the beginning of the crumble

of all the boring social “norms”

and the birth

of the wild and peculiar,

we are falling from the sky above and

rising from the ground below.

Careful now,

for we are coming.