I Crave the Rain

And I had tried
to write out
the pictures in my head
of you
to keep you here
through the eye
of a camel’s needle.
I sloshed through
words and hurricanes,
blues and opiates,
whirlwinds and ocean waves,
big thick mistakes,
tastes and tasks,
the angels softly
with heals first
into the void,
breathing so heavy.

So much pain
loss and suffering
drenching me
to my bones and beyond.
It didn’t seem to matter.

I form crumpled up
words in my mouth
while boys and girls
sleep in late
under my covers
and I stare out the open window
until gushing,
the syllables form themselves inside of me
and then burst forth onto the page,
teething on
birthmarks and tits,
we swim towards
the surface together

but still crave the rain.